balance

so just a few minutes ago, i realized (reminded myself) that i should try to have more balance in life...new years resolution, maybe?

a few minutes ago i've started to clean the house...and as i'm doing so, i remember i haven't done this since thanksgiving (most of which is reflected in laundry and vacuuming)...and i didn't do any christmas baking, i've done very little cooking. for me or any guests..and for some reason, i feel like i've neglected some of my wifely duties in the past few weeks...at least not the type of wife that i feel like lee deserves.

YES...lee and i have both been extremely busy and convenience seems to creep up to the top of our priorities...and efficiency is a must this time of year...but somehow, i feel there should be some sort of balance...and even though i try to make the best of my time and be diligent with it, i feel like there are people out there with way more to do with way fewer resources...

i know i've mentioned it before, but when i think of last christmas i get dizzy--literally...all of the chaos we have this year + buying a house + moving....

but some of this balance begins during the "off-season" if you will...i work 6 days a week along side my 73 year old grandmother (who takes off 1 hour/week to get her hair fixed) and we've made a promise to each other to take off more time when we have the chance...just a day or so a week to take care of our "away from work responsibilities"...errands, groceries, cleaning, time with lee (not so much something granny has to do-haha), and even a little personal time...

i feel like this year at work, i've taken on a lot more responsibility and have a greater presence there, but i've also got to figure out that some of these responsibilities that i have can wait...or i can prioritize and manage my time a little better at work to arrange the time off...and perhaps the biggest thing for me--learning to delegate...just because someone else may not do it exactly like me, doesn't mean that its the wrong way--this is where the only child hannah comes in...because i'd rather do it myself, to make sure its done correctly--even if it means i have 50 other things to do and someone else is looking at me w/ nothing to do...and sometimes i'd rather do it myself because it takes too long to explain what i would like/need done

...sigh...this is hard...

so, i realize that a lot of this may be rambling...but i feel like i did a little growing up tonite...but, i'm thinking with a new year, my new freezer, kicking the planning into high gear, and being a little better organized (i'm game for that!)...i'm feeling good about my idea to be a little better balanced.

and i would also like to mention what a wonderful husband lee has been through this crazy season for us--he's washed dishes (which isn't his favorite thing to do), helped me christmas shop, picked up dinner, gone with me to christmas parties, spent time with his grandmother in the hospital, and taken nershi running (this doesn't sound that important-but it wears nershi out for a good nights rest...and that's good for everybody)....and perhaps the greatest accomplishment of all--putting up with tired ME! (and grouchy on occasion)...i love you, lee and thank you for treating me so much better than i deserve!!!