moving right along!

even though i wouldn't say we're entirely "out of the woods" yet, i'm declaring the formula battle over... soy is doing the trick...

happy baby, regular feedings, no fussiness or (uncomfortable amounts of) gas, and a fair amount of dirty diapers... sounds good to me!

so, we're moving on to bigger and better things now--and i want to thank you all for your prayers.

and i do apologize for boring some of you with the nitty gritty mommy stuff... but hey, its my blog, ya know... ha!

there is no feeling in the world like the feeling of having a happy baby... and there is no feeling like NOT having a happy baby and feeling like there's little you can do to make it better right then... whew... let's stick with the first one, k?

tomorrow, the squirt and i are going to try to get out and run a few errands... i've got them prioritized--depending on...

a) how brave i get.

b) the babe.

jumping for joy soy!

...almost.

today was another good day...

i'm recognizing a need to adjust her schedule ...which would be FINE if it meant this formula was the one that works... she's sticking to the schedule we're on now pretty well--but we may need to add a feeding or two in between (and shift a feeding or two)

i'm still trying not to get too excited, but at day two... my happy dance is getting a little harder to control... yes, jumping for "soy"

i'm excited about the return of my happy baby... i'm seeing an inkling of a glimmer of light at the end of this tunnel... and on the not-so-glorious moments, i'm trying to remind myself of how GREAT she really IS doing...we have oh-so-much to be thankful for... the pediatricians continue to be amazed at how well she's doing and her "skills" ...and i also remind myself that she's really only supposed to be a week old... i'm learning that she's playin' the catch up game REALLY well. even though she's still a little squirt ;)

and i must admit--everyone seems to have stories about their baby and what they went through...which isn't always what i've wanted to hear about in the stress and shock of our situation, it seems pretty encouraging in this particular scenario to have input from other moms...

...i'm hearin' an amen from all the moms out there about all the "unsolicited advice"... ha!

but, i'm slowly learning that sometimes you don't know what advice to ask for--so the only way to get it, is when someone shares their experience with you... yeah, we've all gotta stick together

because it DOES take a village... of THAT i am SURE.

little e's update

[big sigh of relief...]

we started soy formula today. after a traumatic very UP and DOWN sorta day yesterday, that was the last straw. it has been a relatively stressful situation (which is why i quit breastfeeding in the first place) and something i'd hoped to figure out before i "officially" went back to work*

*today.

she simply wasn't comfortable or relaxed after eating. and as much as i tried to make excuses or try different things... it wasn't working.

today, she was an angel... relaxed, calm, pleasant, happy, ...you know, all of those words... and [fingers crossed] she's sleeping VERY peacefully right now...

the hardest part at this point? trying not to get too excited about the possibility of this being the formula... because she started out like this on the last formula...

this has been a growing and trying experience for lee and i... since i'm not particularly known for my abundance of patience, it has begun to effect me in other aspects of life. sigh. i usually operate pretty well under pressure/stress... but not THIS kind of stress... this is the kind that wrecks my usually organized, peaceful life... bleck.

and not to mention the typical mommy feeling of "i just want to make it better right now" and "i don't like to see my baby in pain"....ugh.

stay tuned. i'm gonna catch a few winks while little e is, too...

life.

this week our house will be starting our new normal... our new "life."

mom begins to keep eden 2 days a week... lee's mom keeps eden on saturdays... i'm hoping to take her with me a day or two... and i'm going to be working more than i'm home with the baby.

i went to the grocery store today for a regular trip... not just the bare necessities... :)

heck, i even cooked dinner tonite (cooking is so much better when i'm not pregnant. the joy of cooking has returned. ahhhhhh)... and my hungry husband thought it was amazing! ...whew, if he only SAW me making it... with a screaming baby who just wanted to be held in her snugli...

you know, this thing...

i think nershi enjoyed me cooking with eden strapped to me... seems a lot more fell off the counter than normal. lucky dog.

eden seems to be doing better... sometimes ok, sometimes better... i'll say better because i'm just overflowing with optimism at the moment...

and after an encouraging email from the best sister-in-law ever (hey, steph!) i'm heading out to get some mylicon/gas drops tomorrow.. DUH! why haven't i thought of that? geez... bird brain! (no offense to the birds that read my blog)

and tomorrow i'm going to venture out to church! i canNOT wait to get back... lee and i went so long without a church home... well, we were between church homes... nearly 2 years... now we found one we love and i've not been since the 1st or 2nd sunday in february and i'm NOT happy about it. say a little prayer that eden is well behaved... i'm not quite ready to put her in the nursery yet, but i might change my mind in the morning.

the light at the end of the tunnel bottle...

after being at my breaking point and calling the doctor yesterday

...his answer was to "wait it out through the weekend" (boy, that sounds like a great weekend.) to give her formula 5-7 days to start working...

...not exactly what i wanted to hear...

but, something just clicked last night... she had good solid naps after we came home (not with the "granny magic"), we had a nice "awake time" before she went down for the night...

she slept really well (two 6hr stretches!!) and hasn't been as fussy...

we've also had a good day today... she's been hungry right on time, had good naps, and she's been so much fun when she's awake... even though she did still have a little bit of gas (which didn't seem to bother her!)

tonite she did have a little bit of fussy time between 6-8, but she was still hungry for her bottle right on time and went right to sleep shortly after that...

here's to stayin' on the up and up... i'm not totally convinced we're in the clear yet, but its improving!!

a+ on the scheduling... and i'd give her formula a b+ ...we're gettin' there!

better.

today was better.

...that's all i can ask for and all i can expect!

i died slept from 11pm to 7:30 this morning... that probably didn't hurt...a big "thank you" to big daddy leeeeee for takin' on the night shift :-D

after a mildly frustrating morning, i managed to get out the door--eden seemed to be happier with just the simple act of getting out the door... (hmm, maybe she is like me after all?)

once i got to work, she was still pretty fussy, but granny put her "granny magic" on her and lulled her into a good afternoon nap... so, i got LOADS of work done... and granny was there checking on her at the drop of a hat and every little squirm!

it was nice to get back into the swing of things... stay busy (instead of sitting home worrying about fussy eden)... have an extra set of hands... and do what i enjoy! its nice to get your energy back from USING your energy--know whatta mean??

tonite--that will be my next step... i said earlier today, "it seems like i feed her, work out all of her fussiness, get her to sleep--only for it to be time to eat again... REPEAT PROCESS UNTIL MAMA GOES CRAZY!"

but, i spoke with the doctor today, and we're going to try this formula until monday... by then, things should've been working like they're supposed to... but, if not--monday we start on soy formula...

i'd appreciate your prayers on the matter... mainly for my sanity... because there is NOTHING more frustrating than having a sweet, happy, content, relaxed baby with a tummy ache... that eliminates the "sweet, happy, content, relaxed" part...

ups and downs...

as much as i would like to blog all the time about how wonderful life is (because it is.), we do have bad days too...

like today.

after discovering eden wasn't on the formula that was best for her, the doctor recommended some new stuff to try--which i thought was working pretty well... and it may actually be doing the trick... but in the midst of starting new formula, new bottles, and 3 shots on monday... we may have taken on too much change at one time and life has been a little less rosy this week for eden... and in turn--me and lee.

yesterday, after kiekie left, eden went down for a nap (sleeping great!) and i stepped out for just a second to move my car in the garage...

...saw a few neighbors, chit chatted for a minute (literally, a MINUTE)... came inside to my FRANTIC shaking, drooling (he's not a drooler) dog...

WHAT HAPPENED?!

...that i still don't know... what i've narrowed it down to is either

a. a bug bite of some sort (he did have access to the front porch when i stepped out)... bee sting? who knows...

b. he was scared that he was "left here" with eden by himself... he did hear the garage door and the car crank up...

fortunately, eden was still zonked out, so i had some time to spend exclusively with him... he drooled so much on my legs, i had to get a washcloth--yuck! but i could tell he really didn't feel well... his heart was racing and he was shaking... and when he did walk around he held his head really low... hmmm.... he didn't want water, ice cubes, or his dinner.

...who knows... but he did begin to feel a little better after some mommy time and me rubbing him and checking him for ticks or any sort of bug bite (yeah, like i really knew what i was looking for?)

poor guy--i knew lee would make him feel better when he got home... maybe a quick run or just tossing the frisbee around outside (in the dark)

tick tock tick tock... a few minutes pass...

eden wakes up SCREAMING. what happened to my sweet, happy girl?

...i dunno where "she" went, but i haven't seen her since. well, maybe just a few minutes that i got out and went to the store... granny and aunt lisa talked to her and loved on her. and eden seemed to appreciate the change of scenery. hmph.

she does manage to fall asleep only in my arms (won't let me put her down) once she's TOTALLY worn herself out.

fortunately, lee's offered to take night duty so i can be well rested in case (HEAVEN FORBID) we have a repeat tomorrow... (if so, i'm calling the doctor.)

today was about as close to wit's end as i've been... and yes, of course we'll have good days and bad... but i DO count my blessings... thing could really be a lot worse.

i'm trying to focus on the silver lining instead of the cloud:

*i did manage to lay her in her crib and she's been there for about an hour now... (fingers crossed) she'll stay that way and lee will have a good night with her.

*i did enjoy a glass of wine tonite... eh, it never hurts.

*i'm wondering if she's just had a bad day... and we're hanging on for the week or so the doctor wanted us to try e's new formula.

*aaaand, perhaps she's still reacting to her vaccines monday...

nershi is fine now, by the way... but i do feel a little like my "children" have REVOLTED! haha

alright... i'm off to bed... say a little prayer for us tomorrow... i'm hoping to bring eden along with me to work (which i was supposed to do today...but we postponed for obvious reasons)

and i do know that not all days will be like this... and even as cheesy as it sounds (because there's a country song about it), i'll miss these days one day... eden will be out on her first date and i'd give anything to be back in this moment--sleeping (or screaming) in my arms at just a hair over 6lbs.....